When we are moving forward in life, especially looking to make a change, we tend to hear a lot of ‘don’t look back’ or ‘only look forward’.
I personally don’t agree. I think the past has a lot to teach us.
One of the most important things to mention is that Life Coaching is not counselling or therapy. We don’t look at the past to ruminate on it or focus on overcoming feelings attached to past events. It is important to note that if past events are stopping you moving forward, it may be beneficial to seek the services of a therapist or counsellor to tackle these issues.
In coaching it is important not to discard the past but to use it to help us springboard into our new path.
I always advise clients to reflect on the past, not in a negative way, or to think about the difficulties associated with past events. I ask them to remember what worked for them before in a similar situation. What happened the last time they got a job promotion? What was going on for them that is different to now when they entered into a relationship?
It is also important to think about what didn’t work last time and why. What stopped you from moving out of home at that time? What led you to decide no to take that job offer? When you decided something, what was it about that situation that didn’t work last time?
Lastly, how can you improve on your previous experiences, good or bad. There may have been a decision you made that you regret or didn’t turn out the way you wanted, but it may be a positive move for you now in life. It may also be just as important to figure out how you can stop yourself returning to that cycle (with the help of a coach perhaps 😉 )
I hope this can help you think about looking back to look forward in a new light.
Let me know what you think in the comments 🙂